Friday, August 29, 2008
It's been a while since I posted a pic. Here's a nice shot of D. Wade bringing home the Gold. Call me nostalgic but I think the shirt should have been Blue.
If it wasn't for that whole Star Jones thing (I think I jut threw up in my mouth again), I would suggest that he be inducted into the Corey Hart "I am a Man" Club.
Thursday, August 28, 2008
About last night:
(1) Tony LaRussa is a Grade-A fuckstick: If what the Cardinals do is considered 'playing the game the right way,' then I'm more happy than ever to be a Brewers fan. Yeah, Defendant LaRussa, I'm sure that ball just got away from Wainwright when he drilled Braun in the ribs -- the guy who just happens to be recovering from a ribcage/lower back injury. Funny how those things happen like that.
Also: you're a fucking queefnugget. You deserve every bit of misfortune that befalls you. Tony LaRussa should die of ghonnorea and rot in hell.
(2) The Cardinals are done: I don't know if the Brewers are going to make the playoffs, but I know for sure that the Cardinals aren't. So you say Chuck New Town lit a fire under your asses, Prince Albert? Interesting. You know what kind of teams don't need a fire lit under their asses? Good ones. Ones that are going to make the playoffs because they have good pitching and good hitting and play good defense, not because of some inane shit like 'we're a sleeping giant.' The fact that you referred to your team as 'sleeping' tells us all we need to know. Enjoy getting swept by the Cubs.
(3) The bullpen is going to make the last month interesting: Let's see. Riske can't be trusted. Mota, despite what Tom Haudricourt would have you believe, certainly can't be trusted. Gagne is a crapshoot every time he takes the mound. Shouse and Jesse Orosco just threw a joint 68th birthday party. And Torres has cooled off, as we knew he would.
And, perhaps most importantly:
(4) Happy Golden Birthday, FPMKE: Hope you get that golden shower you've been wanting.
PS-Parra pitched awesome last night and deserved the W.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Monday, August 25, 2008
'Cause I’m a son of a third generation farmer
I’ve been married 10 years to a farmer’s daughter
I got two boys in the county 4-H
I’m a lifetime sponsor of the F.F.A.
Hay! That’s what I make
(I made it that far. The 'hay' pun just about killed me. My heart stopped for 3.4 seconds. I will soldier on:)
I make a lotta hay for a little pay
But I’m proud to say
I’m a God fearin’ hard workin’ combine driver
Hoggin’ up the road on my a p-p-p-plower
Chug a lug a lugin’ 5 miles an hour
On my International Harvester.
We have the power to fix this -- mainly because we know Sheets' Pooter. Hart can't keep coming up to this fucking abomination. So I beseech thee, Va Jay Jay, play something else. It will get you fired, sure, but one of us will take you in when you get evicted.
Here's my suggestion: "Comfort Eagle" by Cake. For one, it's Cake, and Cake is a great fucking band. Plus, it's got that awesome, driving guitar line to open the song, and then the dude starts singing about "building a religion." Fuck yes. Sign me up. I'm a Corey Hart acolyte.
1) Which set of point guards would you rather have?
82.9% 1992 Team USA: Magic Johnson, John Stockton
17.1% 2008 Team USA: Jason Kidd, Chris Paul, Deron Williams
Two very solid point guards and one dazzling young talent don't quite stack up to Magic and Stockton.
2) Shooting guards:
71.7% 1992: Clyde Drexler, Michael Jordan
28.3% 2008: Kobe Bryant, Michael Redd, Dwyane Wade
Did Jordan suddenly cease being the greatest basketball player ever? Seriously?
3) Small forwards:
57.4% 1992: Larry Bird, Scottie Pippen, Chris Mullin
42.6% 2008: Carmelo Anthony, LeBron James, Tayshaun Prince
Two of the best pure shooters ever and another Top 50 NBA player vs Lebron (damn, damn good), a lazy-assed Carmelo and Tayshaun? 42% voted for 2008? How?
4) Power forwards/centers:
93.0% 1992: Charles Barkley, Patrick Ewing, Christian Laettner, Karl Malone, David Robinson
7.0% 2008: Chris Bosh, Carlos Boozer, Dwight Howard
Finally, some sanity is returned.
73.2% 2008: Mike Krzyzewski
26.8% 1992: Chuck Daly
I thought this one would be closer, but Coach K did a great job with this crew.
6) The 1992 Dream Team won the gold medal in Barcelona by going undefeated in tournament play, with an average margin of victory of 43.8 points per game. How would the '92 team fare against the competition at the 2008 Beijing Olympics?
55.3% Win gold and go undefeated, but by a lesser margin of victory
39.4% Just as dominant
3.3% Lose a game in pool play, but still win gold
2.0% Not win gold
The rest of the world has caught up, that's the only reason.
7) Which of these young NBA player do you most want to see playing for Team USA at the 2012 Olympics?
26.1% Kevin Durant
23.0% Greg Oden
11.2% Michael Beasley
9.2% Andrew Bynum
8.8% Brandon Roy
8.6% Derrick Rose
3.8% Kevin Love
3.6% O.J. Mayo
3.1% Josh Smith
2.7% Monta Ellis
5 of these dudes haven't even played in the NBA!
8) Who was Team USA's Olympic MVP?
42.8% Dwyane Wade
32.1% Kobe Bryant
20.8% LeBron James
9) Which nation will pose the biggest threat to Team USA at the 2010 FIBA World Championship?
Wow, I feel bad for Croatia, scoring below Other is pretty rough.
10) Are you more likely to follow Team USA at international tournaments after these Olympics?
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Hardy has 13 hits in his last 37 at-bats with three homers and 10 RBI during the stretch.
This has come on the heels of a cold spell in which he had slides of 0 for 20 and 0 for 28. But Yost doesn’t believe Hardy should be classified as a “streaky” player.
“I don’t sense any inconsistency,” Yost said. “When he was 0 for 28, I didn’t know he was 0 for 28. I don’t follow the day-to-day. What do you do to help me win a baseball game? That’s what I look at. I look at defense, I look at base running, I look at offensive production all in one. You don’t have to just swing the bat to help us win ballgames.”Fuck me in the glory hole, that's like three Yosties in one quote:
(1) Insisting that someone who has, on two recent occasions, gone 0-20 (plus) isn't a streaky player. "I didn't even know he hadn't gotten a hit in six games," said King Ned. "I was going to ask him about it one day, but then I got lost in his eyes and forgot what I was talking about."
(2) "I don't follow the day-to-day." (Hi. I am employed as the manager of a professional baseball team. The entirety of my job involves putting players in position to succeed. To that end, I have decided to ignore what they do on the field.)
I am forced to ask again: WHAT THE FUCK ARE WE PAYING THIS MAN FOR?
(3) "I look at offensive production all in one." (What "offensive production" do you create in an oh-for-28 skid, dipshit?)
I beseech someone in the media: ask King Ned if he thinks Kim Jong Il is a bad dude. Ask him if Anna Farris is hot. Ask him if your farts stink worse after eating Indian food.
Like I said to D's 3Some at the game today: I can't tell if he realizes he's an idiot and says shit like this just to fuck with us, or if he actually believes these things.
Thursday, August 21, 2008
PIT = 2-1
at STL = 1-1
at PIT = 2-1
NYM = 2-1
SD = 3-1
CIN = 2-1
at PHI = 1-3
at CHI = 1-2
at CIN = 2-1
PIT = 2-1
CHI = 1-2
That leaves us at 19-15 and 92-70 for the year. Will that be enough guys? The Cubs play Washington and Pittsburgh next and then they have only one series against a team with a losing record the rest of the year. Please melt down, please melt down.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Manny Parra -- See Bush, Dave, but make him left-handed.
Actually, that doesn't come close to describing the Manny Experience. CC, would you try something with me? (That's what she said.) Let's go on a trip to Imagination Land!
Imagine that Manny Parra is a car, but he's one of those talking cars like KITT from Knight Rider that can drive himself. Let's go for a ride with Manny the Car, shall we? What a nice country road we're driving down. I'm going to roll down a window and enjoy the air. Gosh, such a nice day. Oops, hit a small pothole there, but it's no big deal -- Manny the Car is still cruising just fine ...
Wait a minute. Something's going on here. The car is shaking really bad. Maybe I better close the windows. ... Fuckin' a, Manny the Car, you're driving on the wrong side of the road! We just sideswiped an old lady in a Camry! Oh Christ, now you're headed right towards a school! We just plowed through the chain link fence! I think we ran over a couple of third graders who were playing Four Square! What the fuck! We're really in trouble here. Oh my fucking God. We're headed right for the kindergarten class room. Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck ...
... ... ... Is it over? Is everybody OK? That's weird. Something smells like little kid shampoo. Oh, that's what it is. It's that little dude right there who got decapitated. His head fell in my lap. Sweet. Thanks for the ride, Manny the Car!
Much better. That about sums it up.
Ben Sheets -- At first, you will think your eyes are deceiving you. My God, you'll think, is that an ambulatory vagina? And then the vagina will move a little bit, and you'll think, Wait a minute. Now it looks like a walking turd. What the hell is going on here? Don't worry, CC. You've just experienced the awful, maddening mystery that is Ben Sheets. He's got talent coming out of his ears, but zero moxie. Need a big pitch in a big moment in the game? Ben Sheets is not the guy you want out there.
This fuckstick doesn't just crap the bed, he Alabama Hot Pockets it. He's stolen money from the good citizens of Milwaukee for four years now, and I, for one, can't wait to see some other team have to pay him $18 million a year for 12 wins.
Monday, August 18, 2008
My major concern lies (still) in the secondary of this team. I feel like we have the curse of Terrell Buckley or something because the secondary has been a major issue for what feels like a decade now. Sure Harris and Woodsen are solid/physical corners that can hold their own when healthy, but they are not getting any younger and have very little help behind them ie. safeties and nickel/dime backs (see Jarrett Bush as first off the bench). The organization hasn't put a lot of effort into strengthening the secondary of this team of late, so I hope that our lack of depth does not come back to haunt us. Linebackers = solid. We don't have a Ray Lewis by any means, but they get the job done for the most part. The D-line went from an area of strength and depth one year ago, to an injury away from calling up the Green Bay Burger Kings to find where Gilbert Brown is hiding these days. By the way has Justin Harrell tackled anyone yet?????
So after quickly defining my overall thoughts on the team, my prediction........
Tough schedule this year + inexperienced qb = long season. I will sacrifice wins for production and development from Aaron Rodgers without getting him killed. If he his our boy of the future I don't want him to fold under Brett Favre's shadow and turn into the next Ryan Leaf/Tim Couch. Actually Tim Couch would be a good comparison because the fans were such a*holes to him, he simply crumbled. I think a majority of Packer fans are receptive to him, but from what I hear there has been a little anarchy surrounding the Ted Thompson/Aaron Rodgers regime, such as an 8 year old kid wearing a Favre jersey telling Aaron that he's a piece of sh*t. What a sweet kid. I bet his dad drinks plenty of Milwaukees Best every night when he gets home from work (not there's anything wrong with that).
So there it is. I predict 6-10, but I'll set the over/under at 8. I'll take the under. Who wants some sweet action?
Friday, August 15, 2008
Thursday, August 14, 2008
1827 posts this site
Posted: Yesterday 12:05 PM
Rumor has it, that MU plays Villanova at home on Jan. 1http://quevedobuffet.blogspot....ting-first.html
4153 posts this site
Posted: Yesterday 12:20 PM
Re: Scheduling Rumor
Somehow that seems dubious that a game would be scheduled on New Year's Day. Too many conflicts.....?
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
I'll watch almost any of the events. Swimming? Fucking love it. Basketball? Fucking love it (though Dwyane needs to rethink the shaved head -- without hair, he looks bloated, like a bunch of bees stung him in the cheeks). Softball? Fucking love it. Beach volleyball? Fuck and yes. Synchronized diving? I'm there, motherfucker.
But, for the last two days, I've had to cut back on my Olympic viewing, because NBC insisted on showing the Greatest Abomination in the History of Sport: gymnastics.
(Quick side note to NBC: hook me up, assholes. You want to show gymnastics? Fine. Put it on MSNBC or CNBC or Oxygen or some other fucking channel that nobody watches. Leave the swimming on regular NBC, and show it around the clock. Fuck, you should be replaying that men's 4X100 free relay every 15 minutes anyway.)
My love for all other sports Olympic is perfectly balanced by my undying, boundless, and intense hatred for gymnastics. The basic concept is alright: people flying around and doing flips and shit. Sounds a lot like training to be a ninja, and, as everybody knows, the only thing cooler than training to be a ninja is actually being a ninja. But the basic concept has gotten so incredibly fucked up with the fucking judging.
Here are the rules: to be a legitimate sport, the difference between coming in first and coming in second can't be some Ruski saying: "I like little girl from Red China little better." It's completely subjective. We're told there are objective criteria, but no one can fucking identify any of them. It's a fucking travesty, and it came front and center in the last Olympics, leading the Gymnastic World Order (I'm not bothering to look up the actual name of the governing body) to come up with an even more cockamamie scheme that decides how hard something is before it's even fucking attempted, and then awards points based on how hard it should have been compared to how hard it actually was compared to how well the thing was actually done.
Fuck me. These are my hands. They are in the air, and not because I'm waving them around like I just don't care. It's because your fucking "sport" is a farce.
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
So, I went to the White Sox game tonight (slobber-knocker by the way) and was very excited to see Ken Griffey Jr. in person. I think the last time I saw him play in person the Brewers were in the AL and they were playing the Mariners on a Turn Back the Clock Night at County Stadium. I had this friend who wore his Mariners Griffey jersey religiously... what a gay-rod.
Anyway, so Griffey comes up to bat and his batting music is the Soul Glo song from Coming to America... classic. I had an awkward moment when I realized that I got excited and identified the Soul Glo music prior to Beth's date who was sitting next to me (yes, he was black. Jamaican black, not African-American black but still an odd moment). Here's a link http://www.imeem.com/people/hC7Qw//music/1q8YcCut/soul_glo/ for those of you unfamiliar with the Soul Glo.
At the end of the day, awkwardness aside, I'd really like to see a Brewer have this song as their batting music. So I'm running through the list of... um, not to be racist... "playas"... and nobody is Soul Glo worthy. The only person I can think of is Gagne with his nappy-pachouli-smelling-Canadian-hair. I've had a few beers at this point but the thought of him coming out of the bullpen to the Soul Glo song just makes me giggle uncontrollably.
Two University of Nebraska Wrestlers Featured In Gay Photo Shoot Sans Tights
"Uh oh. The two wrestlers, Paul Donahoe and Kenny Jordan, are pictured nude on a gay p0rn site, fratmen.tv. Donahoe was a national champion in the 125 pound weight class in 2007. He finished third last year. Jordan is a junior. Now the Univeristy of Nebraska is investigating. And you thought trying to find out whether Lawrence Phillips threw his ex-girlfriend down a flight of stairs was awkward. Does the NCAA have a specific rule prohibiting gay p0rno shoots?"
I'm not surprised you missed this story, D's 3some -- this kind of stuff happens all the time in the Husker state. I mean, they call Nebraska "San Francisco of the Midwest" for a reason.
Monday, August 11, 2008
Craig Counsell is a nice ballplayer. He can give a guy a breather and, though he can't hit worth a lick, he can hold down the fort in the field at three positions (not at the same time, which would be some kind of record).
But JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, he's not an everyday player. You can't run him out there game after game after game. He's already struck out three times today, and...
Fine. Go ahead. Hit a two-run double just as I'm typing this. Goddamn elf.
1. seemed personable and almost human-like
2. talked sh*t to Joe Torre whom was sitting in the oppossing dug out
3. re-iterated that he was not retired
This of course got me thinking. He obviously is a major pain in the ass and may not be nimble enough to play even Manny Ramirezesque defense, however just last year the guy had an OBP over 0.500 and was on a terrible offensive team. So I wondered, theoretically of course, of the possibility of Doug Melvin making a push for him to come to Milwaukee. I understand a)the likelihood of him wanting to play in Milwaukee is slim to none b) he would probably want like 5 mil to play the final six weeks and c)we play in the national league, which doesn't have a DH slot, of which I believe Barry stated that is the position he would desire. But for arguments sake, would this be a good move and solidify our run this year. Afterall, we know our pitching staff is going to look a bit thin next year compared to this (both literally and figuratively), so if we're going to go I say GO BIG. Sit Cameron down, slide Hart to center, and stick Barry in the outfield somewhere where he can be as lazy as possible. Inserting Barry in between Braun and Prince would be sick in my opinion and I'd be willing to bet that our RPG would increase by 20-25%. If the Red Sox could win multiple world series with Ramirez out in left, I imagine we would have a great shot as well........even with old Nedly at the helm. Its completely unrealistic, but an interesting thought.
And that's Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy.....I mean E-Money
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Friday, August 8, 2008
Thursday, August 7, 2008
At one point or another over the last month, Favre has lambasted each of these men in the most public, unnecessary, and immature way possible. He called Thompson a liar. He said Murphy tried to "buy him off" with the marketing deal, which, as Murphy made clear today, was complete and utter horseshit. He blamed McCarthy and Thompson for pressuring him into retirement, and then had the gall to say (and I'm paraphrasing here) that McCarthy knew that Favre was going to come back all along and should have been planning for this. In one month, through the tremendous distraction he (and he alone) created in his pathetic effort to satisfy his massive (but apparently fragile) ego, he has undone all the good he did in Green Bay over 16 years. Once and for all, he has revealed himself to be a selfish, emotionally-immature asshole.
And yet all Thompson and McCarthy and Murphy could talk about today was how hard this was for Brett, and how they sympathized with Brett's situation, and how they wished it hadn't come to this point, and how they wished him well with the Jets. They not only took the high road, they built a road on top of the high road and then took that path. It was not entirely unexpected, since these men are undeniably better and more decent human beings than Brett Favre (though, at this point, who isn't?), but their refusal to say anything even quasi-negative about The Prick was striking nonetheless.
For myself, and just for myself, I'd like to say: Fuck you, Brett Favre. I do not wish you well with the Jets. I hope you throw 42 interceptions. I hope you start the year 0-8. I hope you're running for your life from opposing defensive linemen all year. I hope that, as the year goes on, you wake up in cold sweats in the middle of the night as you realize that your decision to come back was a collosal mistake. And I hope the New York tabloids tear you apart in the way that the Wisconsin papers never would. Because you deserve it. I firmly believe that a shit-ton of personal indiscretions were swept under the rug by the Packers organization and the Wisconsin media. I hope you're never given the same kid-glove treatment again, because, as a person, you have done nothing to merit it.
And though I know you're too self-deluded for this to happen, I hope, at some point in the next 40 years, you realize, in some small part, what a petty, infantile dickhead you are and do something to change it. But I won't be holding my breath.
And now, Go Jets!
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
I think the most important thing to be concerned with is Bushy's right arm okay? That's a lot of weight moving around...hopefully he'll be okay to make his next start.
In all seriousness, everyone needs to relax regarding the big fight. It happens. Happened in Chicago last year...Boston this year...probably happens more than we know. And of course its going to be #1 story on ESPN (aside from the late night Favre saga) because a fight in the dugout gives the talking heads something to talk about. Yes, I agree Nedly made a poor choice in words/analogies, but he was right. Its an internal matter, they'll figure it out as a team and they don't owe us anything in terms of an explanation. Manny's pissed because he allowed 4 runs in the 5th after looking awesome for the first 4 1/3. Prince is pissed because he's sucking it up this year and he's probably mad that he didn't stop the grounder to his right in that inning which would have held the scoring to only 2 runs.
This isn't going to cause the end of the Brewers season...it might even light a fire under the team's asses. We'll see, but everyone needs to take a big deep breath and realize this isn't that big of a deal. I'd be more concerned about why Parra hasn't won a game in a while and why we are atrocious at the plate with runners in scoring position. Solo homers are cool and all but they are not going to get the job done.
Monday, August 4, 2008
Reporter questions the teams inability to score runs and why their average with runners in scoring position is so low....answer.....Well they are all good hitters, and I want them to learn situational hitting on their own as they mature as ballplayers. They will turn it around.
What the hell are we paying you for then NED! What do you do exactly? How about explaining to them that swinging out of their shoes doesn't help them hit the ball hard.......when a pitcher throws 90 mph, CONTACT DOES! Maybe ask Rickie Weeks to try swinging a Louisville Slugger versus a caveman's club. Bunting in the first four innings of a game is NOT illegal, and is actually encouraged when your team is struggling to manufacture runs consistently. Or I've got an idea.....COACH! I know it's difficult, but it's not like the good ol' days with Bobby Cox in Atlanta where you just trot your 3 cy young award winners out there and let them do the rest.
Speaking of sinking to new lows, I just experienced deja vu. Correct me if I'm wrong but it was darn close to 1 year ago when Johnny Estrada and Yost were getting after it in the dug out in the midst of our collosal 1st place collapse. Well, this time it's our "leader" Prince Fielder and Manny Parra. I don't know, and I'm sure we will never find out what exactly was said, but unless Manny insulted Prince's mama, wife, kids, or dog, Prince should not be shoving our number 3 starter into the wall the way he did. That's just ridiculous! We have now lost 8 of the last 11. If things don't change in a hurry, the playoffs are going to be an afterthought and we are going to be without Sabathia, Sheets, and soon thereafter Prince whom the more I think about, don't think I'm going to miss too much. Can we bring LaPorta back? Or maybe we can trade Prince for Favre. Prince would be a good fullback, and the way Brett throws maybe he can be our closer.
Friday, August 1, 2008
(JASON KENDALL emerges from pile of ash)
KENDALL: Holy shit. That was fucking intense. I can't believe I lived through a direct nuclear strike. I guess it helps that my skeleton is made of adamantium. I better look for survivors.
(Walks around the wreckage of Miller Park.)
COREY HART: Uhhh...owwww...
KENDALL: Corey Hart, are you alright?
COREY HART: I...I think I'm OK. I was down in the clubhouse when the bomb hit, so my skin didn't melt off. But I think I've got fallout sickness. Better let me lay here like a worthless turd for two days.
KENDALL: Makes sense. Have you seen anyone else?
COREY HART: I think ... I think that's Prince and CC over there.
KENDALL: I think you're right. Prince! CC! Are you guys OK? Wait...are you guys eating?
PRINCE: (Wolfs down an entire bag of Munchos in one movement) We good. (Holds up finger, in classic "give me a minute, I've got some shit in my mouth that I'm still chewing, and I don't want to be rude and spit Muncho shrapnel all over you") Our bodies are so full of synthetic preservatives from all the Tootsie Pops, Snickers, Twinkies, Ho-hos, Sixlets, Gobstoppers, Airheads, Spree, Nutter Butters, Reese's cups, York peppermint patties, Laffy Taffy, Suzy Q's, and Ding Dongs that we're pretty much impervious to a nuclear attack.
CC: Want a Roll-O?
KENDALL: I'm alright, thanks, CC.
CC: Want a Crunch bar?
KENDALL: No, I'm alright.
CC: How 'bout a Twix? Mr. Goodbar? Kit Kat? Krackel?
KENDALL: No, seriously, CC. I'm alright.
CC: Fuck, dawg. Won't you even have a Mentos?
KENDALL: Fine, one Mentos. But I have to keep looking for survivors.
PRINCE: If it's cool with you, we're going down where the clubhouse used to be to see if our hot tub full of Skittles made it through.
KENDALL: OK, guys, be safe out there. We haven't been able to confirm that the Cubs are gone yet.
(KENDALL walks to where the infield used to be.)
KENDALL: Hello? Anybody alive over here?
RICKIE WEEKS: Hey, Jason.
KENDALL: Oh, hey, Rickie Weeks. Are you OK?
RICKIE WEEKS: Yeah, I'm OK.
KENDALL: Oh. Really? You're not hurt at all?
RICKIE WEEKS: No, I think I'm good.
KENDALL: Ain't that some shit. ... Wait, hold on. You've got something on your back. Turn around.
RICKIE WEEKS: Oh, really? Shit. What is it?
KENDALL: (Picks up shattered piece of bat) Just hold still. Let me...just... (Repeatedly stabs Rickie Weeks, because he is a fucking fuckstick who can't do a fucking thing well and is inexplicably allowed to keep fucking playing)
RICKIE WEEKS: (Dies)
KENDALL: Oh, no! Rickie Weeks! No! Curse you, Cubs! I will avenge you, Rickie Weeks! (Looks around, makes sure there are no witnesses who need a "memory adjustment") Sweet.
(KENDALL walks over by the dugout)
KENDALL: Hey, is anyone here?
NED YOST: (Crawls from under the charred corpse of Ted Simmons) I'm here, Jason.
KENDALL: Skip! Are you alright?
NED YOST: Yeah, I'm fine. Being a good leader, as I am, I hid under Simmons when I saw the bomb coming. Sure, most of my team was incinerated, and the rest have radiation poisoning, but at least I'm alright!
NED YOST: Hey, have you seen Rickie? We need him to lead off tonight.
KENDALL: (Silently decides whether to kill Ned Yost, decides he has enough blood on his hands for one day) No. Haven't seen him. Let me know if you do.